I’m frequently asked this question – if Confidence is an inside job how can one feel confident if there’s only the echo of lack of confidence on the inside?
That’s a great question!
Here are three habits I’ve developed over the years that have helped me when I’m not feeling confident in any given situation.
1. I remember a time when I did something really amazing.
I have four such events in my life. These events may not be a big deal for someone else, but for me they were life changing. I will share one with you.
Anger made me forget my fear of the ocean
Even though I was born on an island I didn’t know how to swim, at approximately age 21, on one of my visits to my island, my family and I were enjoying one of our favorite beaches. Our fun and laughter were interrupted by an employee from the hotel. He informed us that we were on private property. Private property! On a public beach! I was livid! I told him a few choice words and jumped in the ocean and swam. Wait a minute! How did I do that? I didn’t know how to swim.
What happened is that inner voice that told me I couldn’t swim was silenced by the adrenalin of my anger. I know it’s popular to say “don’t get angry” but it’s what you do when you’re angry that makes it good or bad. Anger can be therapeutic. Anger can motivate. History has shown us that anger leads to inspired action that bring about positive change.
When I feel I can’t accomplish something, I anchor myself to the memory of jumping into the Atlantic Ocean and swimming like I’d been swimming all of my life.
Your turn –
Think of the amazing things you’ve accomplished and write them done. They don’t have to be amazing to anyone else. If you find them amazing so will your subconscious mind. And if it doesn’t, in time, your repetitive action will make it so. Make it a habit to reflect on one or more of these amazing events when your confidence level is low.
2. The power of relaxation
If you’re a regular reader of my posts or a past client, you know I believe in the power of relaxation. Relaxation is an empowering state of mind and body. Your breathing facilitates relaxation quickly and easily.
I use relaxation to boost my confidence. With each breath, I imagine that I’m breathing out uncertainty and breathing in confidence. It’s magical!
Your turn –
Use the relaxation technique found in my post a quick relaxation technique. As you breathe out, imagine, visualize, feel, picture and/ or taste releasing and letting go lack of confidence and holding on to unstoppable confidence, as you breathe in. You’ll be empowered.
3. I imagine the worse outcome
This habit is Powerful. When I’m not that confident about doing something, I imagine the worse that could happen. I experience it fully. Doing this makes me realize that the worse outcome only exists in my imagination. If, by chance, the worse happens, everything of value and importance will still be in my life.
This exercise frees me to move forward because I have nothing to lose.
It’s a wrap
I believe lack of confidence is tied to being fearful. Feel your fears don’t run from them. And do what you want to do in-spite of them. Your confidence will take wings and you’ll soar.
What is the one think you’ve been putting off because of lack of confidence? Try tip #1, 2 or 3 and share the outcome with me.
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